Being MaNaGe-ARRRR

Like most of the corporate classy. I too had a dream to get a tag of Manager. And when I got I stopped fighting "WAR OF LEADERSHIP”. I stopped proving myself as a leader... I got tag of manager and I was following the spirit of Manager... I wanted to learn how to manage things and resources the way other managers do... I wanted to learn from managers to prove myself as a one of the best manager. I work with American firm and manager's Here, run this apparently "American firm" in quintessential Indian manner. They don't request to do work, they ORDER it. They don't care if anyone have a personal life, they are more concerned about is the DELIVERABLE"..!! 

This actually I learned from few of the manager whom I met in the corporate industry. I am neither pointing anyone nor criticising. It's just an experience thru which I came in the last few months of journey...! Being a true Indian, I know the definition of politics but I have seen it here… PROMOTION???  It definitely doesn't depend on how great you are at your work or whether you come to office on time, it all comes down to how good you are with your manager… So finally in few months I learned to be a Hitler, A Politician. Yes, I got a choice either to follow the spirit of other managers and lead and grow in the life or choose my own path. A path which always produce a leader even when you hold a tag of manager.


I thought for many days and decided to do my part in best possible way in my own style. I seriously don't wanted to copy the style of other manager's...!! I also know sometime those managers who holds "kind of Hitler attitude" are right at their place because they too know they can't give happiness to everyone. None of us on the planet can give happiness to everyone. Yes we all break few promises in this life. We all do. These managers obviously can keep few chunk of champs happy but not majority...
The saddest but true part of the journey is when you are Manager, everyone will expect more of you. Consistent great performance will be anticipated, every mistake will be magnified, and raises will be minimal to get you back within the range. There won't be a honeymoon period. You'll be under a lot of unnecessary pressure during the learning and ramp-up period. It will be impossible to deliver since everyone assumes you already know everything. Growth will be slow. Since it will be very difficult to achieve the unfair and inflated performance objectives. Your juniors who works under you they have different thoughts and choice. They too will expect from you. They will complain for everything and anything where they find difficulty…. 
People say a manager makes a team I would say a team makes a perfect manager. It's all give and take policy. You respect one and in reply you will get…!! 
To all such people / juniors/ subordinates remember you’re in the office to work. Not to bother everyone with your unnecessary shity talk. Nothing’s more irritating or distracting, so don't be that person. Focus and get serious. Look at your computer screen and work!!! Trust me one day you too will be a MANAGER.
Mentally Strong people understand that life isn’t fair. The world doesn’t owe you anything. Don’t waste your time being upset about what happens to you, what other thinks about you and how someone made you feel. You have control over your actions and taking responsibility for those actions will ultimately bring you self-satisfaction. There is no room for negativity here, if you can't work, keep calm and GET OUT!

Dedicated to all the managers and to the one who have dream to become Manager.

to be continued...

Stay tuned my upcoming articles "We Complain" and most awaited one "Why I Run?" The story behind Marathons.  

Relocation Expenses-NCR

“Thanks to my family background, I have enjoyed and conquered several small and big challenges in life. I have failed millions of time, and succeeded may be once or twice. Life is a chase which is not that easy. It is beautiful till the time you are making your life difficult and learnt to enjoy that difficulty. The day you start enjoying comfort, you have lost the challenge thrown by the god himself”…

This article may surely help if you are going to relocate to new place leaving your comfort zone behind you… the journey of relocation sounds interesting but it is always challenging…recently I moved from Bangalore to Delhi NCR.. Bangalore is officially not my hometown but my 10+ years of stay in Bangalore automatically gave me tag of “Bangalorean”…

It was good proud feeling when My 6 friends came to Bangalore airport for my see off.. I was excited about the “Delhi's night life”, “Delhi's marathons”, “Delhi's crowd” and everything which can proudly be said as “Dilwalo ki Dilli”  and I was looking forward to all this. When I boarded the flight from Bangalore, I was wearing a jacket but when I landed at Delhi Airport, I blurted out quiet loud “Fuck, itni garmi” and people around me didn't miss opportunity to laugh at me. It was late night, I was damn hungry and my college junior who came to pick me asked sir lets go to some dhaba and eat something "Desi" (we seriously didn't wanted to eat those sandwich and coffee which were available at the airport) so we decided to go ahead with our dhaba plan to have some smacking "desi khana". We booked UBER with giving optional destination as New Delhi railway station and suggested the driver to stop in between if he finds any dhaba. The funny part was we didn't find any open dhaba or hotel in the route so driver stopped the car at railway station only. First night in the city and it was shattering of one of my dream...”Night life of Delhi”. Somehow we found food at the railway station and broke our few hours of fasting…it was early morning 3:00 am and I wanted to go to my company guest house but my crazy friend/junior. He wanted to spend all the night-morning interacting with few strangers… We continued the spirit of craziness till morning 6:30 AM with cups of tea. Later we decided to move from railway station. He dropped me till my company guest house and left for his house.

The 2nd disaster took place “Delhi Crowd” one of my friend promised me many times to meet when I will be in Delhi…she broke her promise. It’s almost a month now…I haven’t run a single marathon.. Disaster “Delhi marathon”….

Got a new friend in company later realized he is criticizing…creating negativity around me… Disaster “Dilwalo ki Dilli”…

Few things to remember when you are relocating to New City/New State/New Country.

Health- Being one of the fitness freak, I too suffered a lot, caught with high fever cold, cough and was completely on bed for few days. To avoid such cases …please do not eat junk food, unusual food, stay calm and drink water as much as you can. The water and climate varies place to place, so stay cool calm for few days or months later once you are habitual of place… go and hit the street eat those junk which your mom always suggested not to eat...

Friends- With my huge networking across Noida, Delhi, Gurgaon and Indirapuram I took lot of time to choose the best ones to hang out…most of them whom I met they wanted me to give them company while drinking those sorts of Vodkas, few also wanted me to join them till GB Road (the red light area in Delhi) I avoid such people and continued my journey in my way…

Accommodation- Instead of having the hell no of friends and their houses… Initially, I couldn’t find a place for myself to stay… thanks to common floor I found an apartment where I planned to stay for few months… the important thing to take care of and remember “your ass don’t only need chair to rest but you need a bed to sleep”. Make use of apps i.e. Common floor, magic bricks, 99acres etc…

Money: you may laugh and may criticize that how a manager can struggle with money problem but its truth being a manager I have to deal with money problem… I struggled and not only my debit card gave me hand but also my credit card gave up… for a moment I decided to withdraw money from Saving accounts and PF… but family supported me “thanks To My Mom”.. This is common with everyone, it teaches the best lesson in world... Take help from family and friends.. Do not withdraw from savings account and PF... Cause sometime you have to go through worst scenario than this.

I know all of us will die one day. What matters, is how we've lived…how we fought…how we faced the challenges... I had the option to follow other ways too… but I only focused on Honesty, humility, and integrity… Thank you everyone who stood with me at my bad times… Special kudos- My Mom, Noida Local Bar, Cofee, Yadav tea stall at Indirapuram, My few best old buddies and few new faces whom I met recently.

The lesson learned- “I am young and have a long way to go…face each day as it comes”.

Let IT "GO"

Sunday 2:30 Am,…Early morning or late night ….mobile vibrating continuously..... somehow I manage to drag my Lean but heavy-67Kg body till mobile...two miscall...six unread message in WatsApp “hello”,.. “Ritesh so raha hai tu ??”… ”yaar dhoka hua”...."bhai mai mar jaunga".."she ditched me"…”she is *****”....messages from one of my buddy who wanted to give up....!

Before I reply anything, I found my blood rushing towards my brain.. I always get scared after listing a word death... I tried to convince him...I asked simple question to my friend and youngster who is preparing for Civil Services (One of the toughest exam in the world) and it was …“What Is Life And Love” ??.. He gave me the excellent answer but was against my philosophy “Life is a war to achieve love and everything is fair on this mission even death”...I just replied "saale tu pagal ho gaya hai"...”******”…. I said “chhod na yaar...this is not end. This is not life after all…“sai mein yaar...life means more”...he somehow got convinced.

According to me, If this is a war, than it’s not about losing or winning…it is not about the failure or success...it’s not about having or not having.....it's not about desire or undesired...but It's about trying..! ...I believe it's happiness, it's experience...and if life is not happiness than death is not the end..! If death is end than why still people watch the movies of Amrish puri, Rajesh khanna..why people listen songs of Jagjeet Singh,  why people still want to copy the dance of Michael Jackson, why we still follow Mahatma Gandhi...why we want to be patriotic like Bhagat Singh..! Yes sometime death is not end it s start of life...! You will wonder I dint knew Steve Jobs the day he died I googled him and later thought to achieve like him.. Do you think it was the end of Steve Jobs.. No still he is in mind of the youngsters like me..! Yes an artist never dies..  And not only those big names are artist...! We all are the artist of our own life... We all are the CEO of our own Career..!!...

 

 I don't want to write about life I wanted to write about love...! Yes the love which youngsters of this nation do..! Yes the love for which people die, the love for which youngsters do suicide, yes the love for we always want to leave our everything behind us..! Yes the love for which honour killing occurs (still it exists in India)...

Why youngsters lose their life after falling in love ?? .why love birds die??? ... I have seen people blaming the nation, government of India, society and many more...! I say only their parents and they themselves are responsible for their death..! It is better to become misogynist rather than becoming a lover who later dies...misogynist even hate their death... This is not death, not even sacrifice..! They dies and are dead for us…others die yet keep on living for all!!!...love is a art but to become the artist of love you need to live....yes you have to live...!...I think everyone of us have felt once in love where we even demanded  death for ourselves only to get him/her.... If anyone says no..You really need a in-person meeting with me..!..

“Kis jamane me ji rahe hai hum sab??”….  Where nation is in hand of a 50+ year guy and the youngsters of nation dying on the name of Love..! If you have been offended or got pain in love..keep on moving..days will be better...you will find prince/ princess...as I said love is an art and you are an artist.. So, an artist always can paint better than before...!

To the parents of this nation if your kid loves let them love, let them live… Don't become orthodox…. be the kind person and help them to achieve their dreams..!

To the all the lovers….life goes on… Love is not only kiss, hug, sex and death….love is pure.. A sacrifice...a respect… a faith… a hope… a wait… an encouragement … a motivation… a temperament…a world… a belief… a chase… a true journey… a promise…a reward… an achievement....a passion… Love is alcohol addiction only one reason to do it or not to do it…Love is not a smile…it is the sacrifice to earn that smile….Fight for love if it's not in your hand. Let it go...look for other things…other opportunity..!!

Summary- I have seen lot of youngsters spoiling life and career, suffering and crying cause of love..! They need mental support..! If you find anyone help them to fight..!

“God Bless Lovers”

Read my upcoming article "Search of Partner"

Getting MARRIED

“I am in the age group where half of my friends are getting married and remaining half are so drunk, that they can't even find their mobile Phones”

Before you start reading let me clarify.. I am not getting married...this topic is of choice of my ex..where she always wanted me to write an article on Marriage..it may be of her choice.....but dedicated to all the readers..!!

Early morning, I was texting to my crush on WhatsApp, trying to define her the meaning of love and romance. The Moment I slided down on WhatsApp, I messaged "Good Morning, Great day" to her (yes, to my ex)... Trust me, she didn't reply. Out of curiosity, I checked her profile picture, found her selfie where she was keeping her head on the shoulder of a guy (the same head which she used to keep on my shoulder). Did I feel happy??.. IDK...Was I jealous??..IDK..Do I regret??..IDK..but yes may be, because I know..it's the same girl whom I called my love..it's the same girl whom I taught romance.. It's the same girl whom I promised to be with for my whole life..it's the same girl who shared everything with me, it's the same girl who kissed me,  it's the same girl whom I kissed on NH4 (Highway) in rain!! But the sad part here is that the same girl who was doing above-said with me is doing the same with some other guy now and the other guy is none other than her Husband..her choice...Her parents choice..! Now she is married..!!

Do you know???.the only ritual we all commit with maturity and understanding is marriage of two souls...nothing else...many things in our life are uncertain...like....when we are born ...we don't know...when our kids will be born, they don't know...when we will die..We don't know...when someone else will die..they don't know..!! But we all know whom we are getting married to. At weddings, we take crazy pictures, upload them on Facebook, tag others and enjoy the event saying married, taken, getting hitched, etc etc..!! Well everybody have their own style of acknowledging it over the social media, right? ;)

Trust me, have heard from millions and seen from others' experiences[including our parents] this journey is not easy, not at all a cake walk..Selecting a boy or Girl for marriage means choosing a person for life..not an easy job u see...one of my friend rejected more than 20 proposals and when I asked her the reason she explained too but that was out of my course…we stay in a country where a man divorces his wife, because she had a bad breathe while kissing him (yuck...).Calm down man...tell her to brush or use mouth spray before you kiss her..! Yes it may be a silly example but we all look for compatibility in relationship.. Indians are not anymore greedy for sex..Women don't marry the one who took her virginity...we have differentiated sex from our life and May be nothing wrong as sex doesn't give us life but marriage does..

The real shit why Indians Go for Marriage is..!!

1. Dowry - Yes few places still follow tradition of dowry...kick those bastards...!!

2. Unlimited Sex- few still think nothing can be Best than this, socially approved... every morning even neighbors ask "kaisi thi raat (How was Your night)? " tell them sex is not everything..

3. He needs someone to help his mother with the household chores...Why don't you yourself give her a hand then?

4. Oldie- they say you are getting old after 22 for gals and 25 for Boys.. Wtf.. A woman can deliver baby at the age of 50+ and a man holds spirit till 60...(I am not sure, but I read it somewhere)

5.Friends- all your friends Getting Married... Hell, it's not our fault...its his/her choice..

6. NRI - oh so guy is NRI means it's about $$....what can be Best than this..Ask him is there any country better than India..?

And many more....!!!

My personal experience, whenever I open my Facebook I usually find a new status almost on daily basis by some of my friends 'Getting married' and sometimes I feel May be I am loosing something or lacking behind them..But I am sure someday I too will get married ;) <3 (Y) :) I don't know when that some day will come ;)....but eventually it will (hopefully).

Simple and straight suggestion, Don't Marry for sex, don't marry because you are "of age" or getting old...Don't marry because you are lonely or you need someone to support you financially...Don't marry because you like the idea of marriage or admire every wedding gown you see..Don't marry because your friends are getting married but get married when you are in love, she/he is your best friend and when that friendship is no more, but he or she can still make you smile :) Marry him or her.!!

God Bless Married Couples

Leader-Ship

2008, when I was appointed as the head boy of hostel (Hostel Captain) I got opportunity to lead 100+ young minds of nation....my warden told me "the life you are living is dreams of millions"...I gave a surprised look and asked him "Sir, aisa kyun Kah rahe ho?? "...!! He said you are a leader now... (I goggled and tried to search meaning of leader) !! Eventually, I got the opportunity to lead my college football and Basketball team in final year...but life took different path in 2012, when, I started new journey of life... To search a job for myself...I got one....my Dad asked a very simple question...what's your aim for this job? I proudly answered...I want to earn money...he opposed me saying never work for money. Rather work for passion…do what makes you happy…not what gives you money…Money doesn't gives happiness…but happiness may give you money…In simple word he wanted to follow his spirit “work to become a leader and work with a leader”..! After all I decided the ultimate goal of my life is that "I need to work with a leader and become a leader"..!! I joined corporate and started searching for a leader. Let me tell you the truth I dint find a single leader. I can publicly say none of my manager till now deserves to be called as leader..!!

Before you start reading ahead... Ask a question to yourself... Who are you????... Think for 5 sec...1..2...3...4...5....! Over.. So,  you are (Abnish, Sumeet, Nitesh, Pooja, Mahi, Arundhati, Sumi, Priyanka, Madhu, Shireen, Jiten or anyone..........)
Now, Let me ask you!  Who are you?  Who are you?  Do you know???...Who are you?  .... Are you boy or Girl?  ...are you a lady or gentleman? ....are you a recruiter or job seeker? .... Are you a manager or a fresh face? .....are you a psychologist or sexologist?... Are you a Lover or not? ...are you girlfriend or boyfriend?... Are you an engineer or beggar?...are you a cricketer or footballer ?...are you long runner or short runner?...

You May be a combination of many... But u forgot the basic thing..Yes! "You are a human"..!! The human born to serve world, Nation, family and at last him/herself...and to become anything in life first you have to become a true human..! You have to respect the humanity..! And the one who defines the humanity is A Leader....!!

INDIA's population is 1.252 billion... Do you know being the one of leading nation we lack in leadership...we are short of leaders... The few we have is political and other few leading companies like Google and Microsoft in some other country.

We are, if truth be told, a nation of cowards who don’t have the courage to admit their weakness but are happy to blame a well-meaning man or woman (leader) who, perhaps, takes his/her life motto of ‘Izzat aur Iqbal’....yes I am talking about the few folks whom I met in Corporate. Who always love to criticize others ability and quality rather taking their responsibilities as priority..!

Who is Leader?
The one who stands for Izzat (Respect). Either it may be Self-Respect or Respect of his Team mates/Subordinates. If a leader disrespects one he never get chance to lead the same person again in life said by my dad who proudly lead soldiers in Kargil War.

Leader's life is all about Respect. "God Bless Leaders"

Stay tuned upcoming articles "Getting Married"...!!

Let Her Live-2

I wanted to write on this topic "The walls of Corporate has seen more affairs than walls of College" but a recent event changed my mind where I found another woman battling for her dignity and prestige and I decided to write on Let Her Live-2.

Its neither an article nor a story but rather I would say it's a social message for the one who is directly or indirectly mental tortured or harassed by their managers or team lead or may be sub ordinates in corporate companies and for also against the men who think and behave in a way as if they are over authorized....!!

She is being tortured, harassed since years.. Mental torture is no less than physical rape.. But may be more than that where she dies every day....Believe me, She loses a life which she has been dreaming for last 20 years... ..where she is searching for a Prince for herself but gets devil in her own office...she loose trust, she regret being a girl, she suffers,  she cries, she has forgotten to smile and ways of fun, she hate being part of team outing, she loses hope, she forgets her dreams....!!! Yes she is devastated because what she faces in her daily life she can't share with anyone not even with her mother..!!

Either it may be male or female, India have a great tradition and spirit to fall in love with crush....! Nothing wrong, if you have crush on someone go and talk... Demand what you want???..But, If she/he is not interested..Move on dude..Crush your crush... she/he is not meant for you...Don’t give a fuck, simple as that she/he doesn’t want...!!

To the woman who goes through such harsh pain in Office/companies... Remember your life is prestigious...talk to such people in a decent way... Don't give them a damn...rather say you are not interested...tell them twice and thrice..Every educated understand the priorities of a woman...if not, go and complain- company HR, Local police..File the case and fight for yourself..!!! It's good to be a fighter rather being a coward...!!

To all such man I end this asking a simple question..

-Is this the future you want for your daughters and wives ???

To society and girls...you aren't alone.."Let's Join Hands".. We are with you! 

tO be COntinued.......

http://leadbhardwaj.blogspot.in/2015/03/let-her-live.html (Let Her Live)

Stay tuned my upcoming article.."Leadership" and "Getting Married"....!!!